Sunday, 18 September 2016

Writing Effective (and Requisite) Essay Openers

When we write for college courses, we write for an audience other than ourselves. And it's an audience of more than one--the professor who assigned the piece. A good way to think of (and never forget) audience is to imagine we are writing the assignment for a popular magazine that sits in multiple copies on the shelves of an equally popular bookstore. For each magazine sold, pretend, we get a percentage.
Our goal, then, is to have as large and widespread a readership as possible--to hook as many browsers as we can--with an effective opener (also known as an introduction). We therefore must engage, first, before we entertain, educate, or inform.
First the Caveats and Comments on Ineffective (Bad) Openers
NO to SNORE openers - Forget burdening or alienating your readers with comments of how many people in many countries have many different ideas about life and society and all those other blah, blah, blah hard-to-wrap-the-brain-around opening commentaries...which really just send the reader off to find a more intriguing read.
NO to OBVIOUS - Similar to the snore generalizations, the obvious comments in an opener will have eyes (if not heads) rolling as readers take in the TV is mental masturbation or ads are used to manipulate us statements you can avoid--by using an old Marshall McCluhan quote or Cleo awards description, for example, instead.
NO to HYPERBOLE - Putting myself through school as a waitress, I had a number of regular customers who were writers, too, they said. They would talk at me all through my shift, reciting their best work. One insisted on reiterating his description of the verdant rolling hills that kissed the edges of the glistening waters at the feet of the majestic span of the Golden Gate Bridge...until I would get so mental I would fantasize about bringing the heft of the glistening glass coffee pot screaming down onto his head. In other words, do not exaggerate. Do not bring in heavy drama and description that will overwhelm and, again, alienate your readers. Stick with the truth. Stick with the openers that work.
We Use Modes for Engaging Openers...and I'm going to Use One Here, Out of Necessity...and Spite
I once read a how-to article on web content writing, on making a site that brings traffic (the attention of many). I had already begrudgingly given in to the understanding that web content writing is very different than academic writing--it has different goals, different audiences, and different elements that lend themselves to an 'A' piece of writing. In fact, it is so different that to write for the web we have to unravel all we have worked to weave, have to unlearn all we have learned as college English writers.
Don't Confuse Web Content/Writing and Academic Writing
So the writer of this article says to start web copy you skip the opener and go directly to the main point (what we in academia know as the thesis). Okay. This made sense, I thought, as web readers read differently: they read fast, they skim, they scan, they draw the most usable info in the shortest amount of time. (Probably the way you are reading now, hoping I get on with the point).
-I was with Mr. Web when he explained these facts.
-I was with him as he noted the research findings that back up the rationale for sacrificing good academic exposition for web text.
-And I was there with his tips and tricks, which were great...until he went too far, editorializing about writers who actually use openers:
He claimed that writers who rely on openers don't have "the courage" to just get to the point. So he lost me.
Don't Let Anyone Shame Your Learning Writing Tricks
We can adapt to just about any rhetorical style. We can adjust our notions of what makes for good writing. But we should balk when a how-to writer insults other methods of writing. We should even disregard implications of cowardice as unnecessary ad hominem attacks. False attacks. Fallacious and floppy and frivolous teaching. Screw that.
Readers of Academic Essay Writing Appreciate (even Prefer) a Good Opener
Openers in academic writing, whether in a creatively developed literary response or a historical survey, are imperative. They are a gentler way of drawing in, luring our readers. They are at first quite challenging to get right, but our mastering them--which is possible--has nothing to do with courage, which comes from the French word, "coeur," heart. We have plenty of heart. We're studying English, for hell sake.
Against my wishes, then, this page opens with a declaration and gets right to the point. At first. But it also has a "grabber" slipped in--because we're looking at grabbers and because, well, I can't help it. I want to model decent prose for you.
Samples of Effective Essay Openers by Mode/Type
Even better, I'll share with you some samples, written by my former students (who have granted permission for the use of their work as models):
****People Love Stories. We Love to Tell Stories. The Narrative Opener:
Once upon a time, during the era of slavery, whites were afraid of blacks, and the "word" was born. That's why someone came up with the "word." Two hundred years later around my sister's house, the children still use this "word". Sometimes I even hear myself say this "word." But guess what? I check myself and correct myself, because when you use the "word" to address someone, no matter who you are or what color you are, it is totally disrespectful.
The word: "nigger". (1)
****To Establish Credibility, Try a Sober, Scholarly Introduction. The Statistics/Facts Opener:
By the age of forty-four, 47 percent of American women will have had an abortion. (Day 6) To describe this statistic as anything other than a tragedy is to deny the sanctity of human life. The Christian abortion debate rests upon the moral and theological dimension[s] of this issue. To examine the moral dimensions of abortion without examining the social realm is to ignore the mutually dependent relationship that surrounds this debate. (2)
****Appealing to the Senses Lures and Keeps Readers Interested. The Descriptive Opener:
Rain is pelting my car relentlessly as I drive home from [XXX] College. Cars rushing on the freeway cause the water on the pavement to burst into a fine mist, surrounding each and every vehicle with a billowing sheet of opaqueness. Finally, I arrive in front of my little two-bedroom home. With a sigh of relief, I enter my living room.
Lately, this house has turned into a haven of safety, sheltering me as much from nature's elements as from the unpredictable and unprovoked malevolence I experience from one of my instructors. My dread is heightened by the fact that I appear to be the primary recipient of this teacher's outbursts of viciousness. Slowly, my gaze shifts across the room and comes to rest on the play I have to read for my English class. It is Mamet's Oleanna. I pick up the book and soon find myself drawn into the story. Quickly, it becomes clear to me that this play [deals with] the relationship between a teacher (John) and his student (Carol). While both characters show evidence of an interesting variety of behaviors, John mesmerizes me to a greater degree. I begin to wonder whether John displays symptoms of an underlying psychological disorder. (3)
Put the Readers in the Frame, Inside the Paper. The Direct Address Opener:
You are in the midst of a blazing inferno. Your mind is moving at the speed of light. Yet you are paralyzed by fear. The silence is deafening between the confinement of the four walls. You are no longer in control. You wonder how the communication between the members of the family has ceased, specifically between Mother and Father. Each passing day, only silence can be heard. The usual chatter at the dinner table is considerably lessened. It comes down to, "Pass the corn, please." Or one excusing oneself from the table. (4)
Advance Trust, Establish Authority from the Start. The Authoritative Quote Opener:
"Generations of students have studied calculus without ever seeing its power." This statement is found in an article by K.C. Cole titled, "Bringing Calculus Down to Earth," from The Los Angeles Times. I most certainly agree with Cole. At one point earlier in the course of the class (calculus), I was not sure about the use of calculus and the importance of it. Others like me, such as friends, felt the same way. For this reason, I would assume, I am doing this research. This research is for students like myself to realize that "there is something about calculus," as Cole states in the article.... (5)

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